Do not just yourself, be the best ones. Take what makes you, and then build and enlarge it. Being yourself does not mean that you have to be stuck in place or always repeat the same pattern of behavior. Instead, self-activity is an endless process that continues momentarily, day by day and year from year. We are constantly recreating ourselves and discovering new things that make us who we are.
Here are a few essence of principals to consider when you try to improve yourself through this journey of life. They are principals that I believe apply to all areas of personal development. If you are trying to be healthier or more relevant or improve your career, you can follow these rules and understand what you need to do to wake your best self.
Identify your positive features.
When we find things about ourselves that we want to change, it's very easy to focus only on our shortcomings and forget about the positive qualities we already have. Say you want to build more meaningful relationships, but you have a lot of past illnesses. You may fall into a trap of thinking: "This is all I am. I'm just an inconvenient person who does not know how to interact with others." But more than likely this is not true. Instead, you probably have some positive experiences with individuals, you're just less likely to remember them while you're away from yourself.
Think harder. I'm sure people who like you ask yourself, "What do I think about me?" Then take out paper and put out some of these positive features. Perhaps you are:
List of all positive features will be a bit different – It's important that you be honest with yourself.
You can then expand to this list by remembering events in your life that resurrect each feature. Remember that once you were with your friends and you said this awesome joke everyone was laughing at? What about that time did you help someone with homework in mathematics? Or the time you ordered to listen to an ear when someone went through rough time in his life?
You see? You're not as incompetent and you've thought about yourself first. By giving you regular reminder of what you have outstanding, you can better cultivate these features in the future. And by reflecting these positive moments in detail, you can revive the qualities about yourself that you have since forgotten. Use these past memories as a resource to learn from and build on.
Raise your expectations.
Some have what is known as the "Upper Limit Problem." They want to improve, but only until a certain point. Once they have reached that level, they stop. Perhaps they did not think they deserve to go further? Maybe they are really afraid of too much success? Or could they not be willing to do what they need to maintain their new life?
Of course, nobody can be infinitely successful, but the "Upper Limit Problem" hurts when people know that they are capable of more than opting for. They actually stop their own growth, even though there is a greater chance of being taken. I do not imagine chasing something you know you are able to be very annoying. It's always there "What if?" question long lasting in the back of your mind.
- What if did I take this job as CEO?
- What if I married someone I thought I really understood, instead of just putting on what was available at the moment?
- What if finally completed the book I had worked on?
- What if I took this holiday to Europe again on my university day?
When we do not live much out of our lives, we tend to accept what might be better. Some tend to lower their standards when their goals become a little more difficult than they would have liked.
But "success" (and I use this term lightly – because there are many different ways to succeed), are always trying to raise their standards. Perhaps you are a scriptwriter who has already written 3 movies, but you want your next one to be your best. Perhaps you're a musician who's already signed on to the label, but you want your next album to go to platinum or work on Grammy. Perhaps you are a blogger who is happy with 100 visits a day, but now you want to work up to 1,000 visits a day.
When ordinary men achieve something, they themselves have obligations about their current status in life (which is not always bad). But when successful men achieve something, they always look for the next plague.
I would recommend that everyone has at least one part of their lives as they are constantly raising their standards. It gives you a sense of "constant growth and progress" that really gives you the feeling of being alive. It screams passion.
Discover positive models.
When you try to get the best of your self, it's often useful to discover positive models that describe the symptoms you want to grow for yourself. You can find these positive roles anywhere: in movies, literature, TV shows or in your relationship with friends, family and other strangers. You can use this effect as a resource to search for and learn from. Imagine what they would do in a certain situation, then model the behavior to see if it works for you.
Of course, it is completely different and none perfect, so you should not imitate all from one person. Instead, mix and watch what works for you. Mike Tyson is a good model for a competitive attitude, but you do not want to shape his negligence beyond the circle. Bono can be a good example of philosophy, but you do not need to enjoy the music unnecessarily. People can shape positive qualities, even if you are not necessarily as a whole, showing intelligence and development.
Discovering positive models in my own life has been one of the most effective methods in my personal development. I have a list saved on my computer by over 100 different people I think possesses personality features that I want to build on myself. I look at the archetypes that I have consciously built in my mind, they represent different attributes like Humor, Courage, Spontaneity, Intelligence, Sexuality, Good Communication, among other things.
Be prepared to experience growth.
A change is often always met with some kind of opposition. It takes a little bit of time to get you new to yourself and you should be aware that when you first start making changes, you will be tired of clicking back on the original form (this may in part be because " Upper Limit Problem "discussed before).
As I have mentioned in other recent posts, it is almost impossible to go through any level of personal development without any inconvenience or pain. It's one of the things that is inevitable, but also a good sign of pushing yourself and exploring a new territory. Successful athletes, for example, learn to embrace their physical pain as a clue of growth (this is identified in the popular phrase "no pain, no benefit"). But similar pain is often experienced through other forms of personal development: start a new relationship, a new job or another personal goal. Pain can be psychological as much as it is physical, but it will probably be where you create your best self.
Please make sure that not all the pain is good. There may also be signs that this is not what you want. In that case it is important to reflect values and goals and determine if there is something that you have not considered. Maybe when you were young, you got the wrong impression that you wanted to be a doctor, but when you went through Pre-Med school, the subject was not interested in you anymore. That example might be right to reset your goals to something more appropriate. Do not just push through all the painful blindness – make sure there is evidence of growth and not a sign that you are doing something that is incompatible with your best self.